I am fine.

I finally conceived by the end of December 2012.
Hubby and me both knew it was the aftermath of our 2nd anniversary honeymoon.
But the pregnancy only lasted till the 6th weeks.
1st January, I swore I felt some cramping at my abdomen area, thought it just a regular tummy ache and the urge to go to the toilet.
But it was a bleeding that sent me to the emergency ward, and admitted for the damn 5 nights.

It was a miscarriage again.
The second one.

I am fine by now.
Grateful.
Because I still have my beloved and supportive ones by my side, anytime and everytime I need them.
Alhamdulillah.

But, I still have my what ifs:
What if I never feel another heart beat inside of me next time around?
What if I am not able to cradle another soul inside of me?

But, whatever what ifs,
I am fine.

inshaa Allah :)